Truth Being Told to My 20-Year-Old Self: A Love Letter!

Hey Love, bring on your sunny glow!… Truth is, we all have those moments where we wonder— What if I knew then what I know now? Those little self-reflections that hit out of nowhere—leaving us feeling both nostalgic and hopeful, thinking about all the lessons we had to learn the hard way. Since we can’t turn back time, we do the next best thing—we take what we’ve learned, grow from it, and keep moving forward. But still, wouldn’t it be something to sit down with our younger selves, share some wisdom, and let her know it’s all going to be okay?

This is me, showing up real and unfiltered.

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“Truth Being Told to My 20-Year-Old Self” is the heart of today’s blog—a conversation that feels like sitting down with an old friend, coffee in hand, reflecting on all the things I wish I had known back then. It’s the kind of self-talk that sneaks up on you in quiet moments, in the middle of the night or while staring out the window, lost in thought. Life has a way of teaching us what we need to know, often the hard way, but every misstep, every lesson, every moment of doubt led to growth.

Looking back, there’s so much I’d tell my younger self—but maybe she had to figure it out exactly the way she did.

A Candid Search for the Truth

If I could sit across from my 20-year-old self, I’d take a moment just to watch her—bright-eyed, so full of energy, chasing dreams like they were right within reach. She believed in forever friendships, in love that wouldn’t fade, and in the idea that life would follow some perfect plan if she just worked hard enough.

I’d smile at her optimism, knowing life would teach her in its own way. I wouldn’t rush to change her, but I would tell her this: Having a kind heart is a gift, but don’t give it away so freely that you’re left empty. Not everyone who walks with you will stay, and that’s okay. Some people are meant to fall away.

I’d tell her to slow down, to stop racing ahead and appreciate where she is. Not everything needs fixing, and not every battle is hers to fight. Some things are best left to unfold on their own.

And most importantly, I’d remind her that her worth isn’t measured by how much she does for others. Saying “no” is just as powerful as saying “yes,” and not everyone cheering for you is truly in your corner.

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And then, I’d share the truth she might not want to hear. The truth I still wrestle with today:

Some wounds don’t heal—they become part of you.

Not every chapter closes neatly. Some betrayals will never make sense, and some pain will linger. But it doesn’t define you. Healing is about learning to live fully even with the scars.

But here’s another truth, one that shines just as brightly: Love is real. 

The Truth You Already Know

I would tell her that she already has a lot more wisdom than she realizes. You don’t need anyone’s approval to validate your choices. That gut feeling you often question? Trust it. It will guide you even when your emotions and logic are at odds. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone who doesn’t get it. Stay firm in what you know to be true, even when you feel like you’re standing alone.

• Friendships and Family

Family is sacred. The bonds we share by blood are meant to be lifelong, but not every family member will be there for you when you need them most. Some will uplift you, while others may only show up when it benefits them. Pay attention to who truly supports you, not just when it’s convenient. Family is supposed to be unconditional, but sometimes it isn’t. It’s okay to walk away from toxic family dynamics, even if it’s hard. Just because they’re family doesn’t mean you owe them a permanent place in your life.

Friendship, too, is sacred. Choose your friends wisely. Not everyone who walks beside you is meant to stay. Some friends will bring joy and laughter, while others may drain your energy or hold you back. Surround yourself with those who genuinely celebrate your wins and who stand by you through thick and thin. It’s okay to outgrow people, and it’s okay to walk away when friendships no longer align with your values.

Don’t waste time on anyone, who can’t make up their mind about you. If someone’s unsure or makes you feel like you’re only an option, let them go. You don’t need to convince anyone of your worth. The right people—the ones who see you for who you truly are—will never make you chase them. Love, whether from family or friends, should feel like home, not a battlefield.

• Love is More Than a Dream

When it comes to love, you’ll win some and lose some. But don’t let the losses harden you. Heartbreak, disappointment, and moments of feeling unchosen don’t mean love isn’t real—it just means it hasn’t arrived in the way you expected. But the truth is, Love exists, even if it doesn’t look the way you once imagined.

People will hurt you, not because love failed, but because their feelings wavered. That’s on them, not you. Don’t let those moments close your heart. Love isn’t perfect, but it’s worth believing in. The right love won’t need to be chased—it will find you, choose you, and stand by you, even when things get hard.

• Dreams Don’t Expire

There will be moments when you wonder if it’s too late, if the chances have passed. They haven’t. Your dreams are still within reach. The timeline you’ve set for yourself isn’t the only one that matters. Life doesn’t unfold on a straight path, and that’s okay. Your dreams are meant for you, even if the journey takes a detour or feels slow. Keep moving, even when doubt tries to cloud your vision. You have the strength to keep going. Your dreams are not just possible—they are waiting for you to reach them.

Final Thoughts

To my younger self—keep going. But don’t expect to stay the same. Growth can be messy, and healing isn’t always perfect. Life is full of surprises, and honestly, that’s what makes it beautiful. You’ve always known that, deep down.

Through it all, don’t forget to cherish and honor your parents. They gave you the roots to grow, and even when things get tough, those bonds are worth nurturing. Motherhood will stretch you in ways you never imagined, but trust me—what you give is enough. You’re already doing your best, and that’s more than enough.

Love? Oh, it’ll break your heart sometimes. There will be moments when it feels out of reach. But don’t let that make you stop believing in it. Love is always worth hoping for, always worth chasing, no matter what the world tries to tell you.

.And if I had one last piece of advice, it would be this: Trust yourself more. You’ll get things wrong. You’ll make mistakes. But you’re wiser than you know. You don’t need anyone’s permission to chase your dreams, to be unapologetically you, and to love fully. You are not too much. You never were.

Now, I’d love to hear from you—if you could sit down with your younger self, what would you say? Let’s talk about it in the comments.